Do's n Dont's for software engineer

1. Never ever write a line of code that someone else can
understand.

2. Make the simplest line of code appear complex. Use long names.
Don'tevercode "a=b", rather do something
like:AlphaNodeSemaphore
=
*(int)&(unsigned long)
(BetaFrameNodeFarm));

3. Type fast think slow.

4. Never use direct references to anything ever.
Bury everything in macros.Bury the macros in include
files. References those include filesindirectly from
other include files.Use macros to reference. Those include files.

5. Never include a comment that will help someone else understand
yourcode.If they understand it they
don't need you.

6. Never code a function to return a value. All functions must return
a pointer to a structure which contains a pointer to a value.

7. Never discuss things in concrete terms.
Always speak in abstract. If they can understand you they
don't need you.

8. Never complete a project on time. If you do they will think it was
easy and anyone can do it and
they don't need you.

9. When someone stops by your desk to ask a question,talk forever but
don't answer the question. If they get their questions answered
they
don't need you.

10. Never clean your office. Absolutely never
throw away an old listing.

11. Never say hello to anyone in hallway.
Absolutely never address anyoneby name. If you must address someone
by
name,
mumble or use the wrong name.
Always maintain the mystique of bring spaced out
from concentrating on complex logic.

12. When you are having lunch at the office canteen,never
fully concentrate on your lunch.
Try to get absent minded suddenly in the middle of the
lunch and say to your colleague something
like:"But I don't think that datapage was actually locked by
another RX call, rather I see the possibility of
a wrong access mode." Other wise they will think
you are not serious about your job and then they won't
need you"